Good Advice

Good Advice—Psalm 34: 1-8; Ephesians 4:25-5:2

            A hard truth that I have learned as I get older is that parents really stop offering all that free advice after some point. As a teenager and youth in the early to late 20s, parents are willing to offer all sorts of advice. The problem, you see, is that teenagers and young adults are headstrong enough that they don’t listen. I know that was true for me. Youth are gung-ho, bulldozer-like in moving forward and often learning the hard way. Now that I’m in my late thirties approaching early forties, I ask for advice all the time, and I know many of my friends do the same. How long do I heat this in the oven? How do I get this stain out? What car should I buy? What’s the best way to negotiate? How do I get my taxes right? How do I avoid jury duty…and so on…

            The problem is, at that point, parents are tired and done. I can’t tell you how many times my friends have complained about the response, “You’re an adult. Go figure it out.” NO! NO! Now is when I need the help, when I’m finally smart enough to listen to it! Such is life, I guess. One of my favorite things about the scriptures, and in particular the Gospels and Epistles is that we don’t just get words of salvation and grace. We also get words of wisdom, good advice for how to live on this earth in our life’s journey. That is what today’s Epistle does for us—it provides us with some good advice.

            One of the first things we see is that faith demands a sense of change from us. There’s a whole laundry list of ways to behave properly: don’t lie, don’t let anger get ahold of you, don’t steal, don’t say hateful stuff, don’t bring sorrow to God’s Spirit, and then riding ourselves of all types of bad characteristics. Running around while filled with bitterness, rage, anger, harassing words, and slander is probably not a good way to live. It is both bad for us personally, and it ruins our ability to claim the goodness of God in our hearts.

            When we say we have faith, it should cause a change in our heart and behavior. It should lead us to deal gently with others. The same Christ whom we follow said to love enemies, love your neighbor, bless those who treat you badly, turn the other cheek, and so on. That’s a tall order. If someone is being a snotwad, I’d much prefer to smack them in the head than bless them. A friend of mine said, “Remember Jesus said to bless those who persecute you, not bless them out.” Following Jesus and living in this world requires us to give up some of the old ways of doing things.

            It reminds me of the story of a boy in elementary school. He and another little boy got into an argument, and he ended up hitting that boy pretty hard on the playground. The teacher made him go apologize for hitting the other kid. About 10 minutes later he hit the kid again. The very irritated teacher asked why he did that again. And the boy replied, “Oh it’s fine, I’ll just apologize again later.” That’s not how it works. Forgiveness and apologies are not a license for bad behavior. It’s like a church sign I saw said, “Don’t be a jerk, follow Jesus instead.”

            Instead, we are given the push from this letter to the Ephesians that we should “imitate God, therefore, in everything you do, because you are [God’s] dear children.” The letter goes on to say, “Live a life filled with love, following the example of Christ.” This was a big theme for Paul. He often directed wayward or fledgling churches to mirror or imitate other churches that were following Christ closely. He also calls on people repeated to imitate Jesus. Imitating Jesus is how we live when we change these old attitudes.

            A friend of mine once asked, “So, if I’m to imitate Jesus, how do I do that because I see a lot of Christians who don’t seem so Jesus-y.” Look to the Gospels. Follow Jesus in the way he lived his life and presented a life of faith in the Gospels. He was kind and gentle with people—never condemning the woman at the well nor the woman accused of adultery. He tried to teach and help when correcting Peter and explaining things to Nicodemus. He upended the order of power and might with his teachings on the Beatitudes. None of these things are easy. Why is it we see the Ten Commandments posted everywhere, but no one posts the Beatitudes? How many places do you see that nailed to the bulletin board or on a monument in front of the building? What Jesus taught is often very hard to live, but it’s the best advice we have for journeying through this life.

            There are many examples of the struggle to imitate Jesus. How many people do you see today taking the opportunity NOT to cast the first stone. We’ve become a society which carries an entire bag of rocks ready to go. That’s not Jesus, and that’s not imitating Jesus. How many alleged Christians confuse and co-mingle their faith and their politics? Jesus said to give to Caesar what is Caesars and unto God what is God’s. They are not the same thing. How many people live in fear and dread in this world oppressed in their own mind by a lack of trust? Jesus said, “Behold, I go to prepare a place for you.” How many times do we look down on other people for their gender, race, ability, and love, when Jesus said, “Judge not lest you be judged,” and by your own hefty standards. We’d all fail on that, for Jesus reminded all have sinned and fallen short.

            Any way you go in this life if you’re not following Jesus and imitating the way in which Jesus lived, served, and taught, then you can very easily fall into the trap of becoming a jerk. I think Paul would call it a godless heathen, but jerk sounds a lot more theologically appropriate. Jesus gave us a way to live in this world. There are 7.9 billion humans in this world, and 333 million in the United States alone. We have to find a way to live and work together or life will be miserable.

            Human behavior can become exploitive, greedy, insensitive, and prejudiced. But Jesus gives us this beautiful image of a good way of life to follow. A friend of mine posted something on Facebook which said, “How we walk with the broken speaks louder than how we sit with the great.” Paul highlights the most poignant parts: don’t lie, don’t be angry, don’t be a thief, don’t go around creating a miserable existence for everyone you encounter. The scriptures tell us that the JOY of the Lord is our strength.

            Following Jesus and imitating him is not for the faint of heart. One of the reasons I like asking my mom for advice a lot more now that I’m older is I’ve learned there’s a family trait of doing things the hard way. And I’m hoping to avoid this family trait. In some ways that symptomatic of our society. We tend to do things the hard way because we don’t listen to good advice…or listen at all really. Throughout the ages, God has never stopped speaking, leading, guiding, giving wisdom and understanding. The struggle is on our side. Do we listen?

            I learned a lot of things from good advice in life. I know the importance of being friendly and kind from my mother. I know how to cook from my grandmothers, and what secrets get things done better. I know how to farm and grow crops from my grandfathers. And I know how to ride a four-wheeler ATV at breakneck speeds in the mountains without crashing from my dad. All through life, we have people who are willing to give us advice, encouragement, and little tidbits of wisdom, if we are willing to listen.

            The same is true with God. “Taste and see that the Lord is good. Oh, the joys of those who take refuge in [God]!” says the Psalm. “Imitate God, therefore, in everything you do, because you are [God’s] dear children. Live a life filled with love, following the example of Christ.” The wisdom is there—take refuge in God and imitate the example of Christ. Why do things the hard way when we can follow Jesus’ way instead?

Video: https://www.facebook.com/fccmacon/videos/1246248236741403